Wednesday, May 30, 2007

The Wrong Bernie

In 2004, a Fall River MA group called Green Futures had an art show in order to raise awareness of the plight of an unfortunate sewage outflow known as, by the local deluded romantics who have nothing else to live for, The Quequechan River. Yes, quequechan is a native word meaning 'leaping waters' which has been twisted around to mean 'falling river' so that 'Fall River' would make sense as a name. The Green Futures art show is where the painting here came from. I wish I could credit the artist, but the article is a reprint from one of the freepers out of We'll Try City, so I can't even vouch for its authenticity. It's a nice painting. Or photoshop job. Or whatever.
I congratulate Green Futures and urge anyone with local interest to look at Green Futures' ideas for canoeing, fishing, and other recreational activities around the real, open Quequechan. Since they've been around since 1993, the river should, by now, be a very clean riverfront and developed recreational part of SouthCoast. Except that everyone in Fall River is too busy hanging their tools on sky hooks, writing IOUs on coughs, and blaming everybody else.
I had a few seconds between real projects today and turned on the radio to get news. I accidentally hit the preset for the local radio station and heard the theoretically "impartial newsguy" doing his right-wing conservotard broadcast. He was urging the other listener and I to stay tuned to hear a great commentary from "Bernie Sullivan."

Back in the last century, when I worked at a Fall River radio station very similar to that one, I worked with a Bernie Sullivan. Bernie was that affably cantankerous kind of newsman that usually has the last canny insightful line in film noir. A quick-with-a-good-natured-quip-knows-everybody-and-doesn't-have-to-do-this-for-a-living guy whose bosses underestimated him because of his high school education and hard-knock diction. I liked Bernie, so I listened through the news with the kid who kept saying 'fotty' when he meant 'forty.'
Then came the promised commentary. Which was delivered by a creepy old political hack who couldn't make it as a priest so he worked at a couple newspapers NOT THE BERNIE I knew. Besides, this desk jockey started his soppy twaddle by calling Troy (Fall River's maiden name) a village; Troy was a town. But he continued his phantasm, droning on about how (I'm not quoting here) God told him to urge all God's chillun to work to uncover the God-given beauty of the rivergift God gave us and hadn't we neglected those poor diminished torrents and aren't we very hopeful people and any politician running for anything in Fall River should make a loud and affirmative noise or Bernie or the nasally kid with the speech impediment or the talk-show-and-news guy will darn well come and flash press credentials or something and that pol will rue the day he ever trifled with the Fifth Estate in the soon-to-be-great-again city of Fall River, boy howdy!

So, even the weird challenge of diverting a bridge and interstate highway system, relocating businesses, establishing a city as a destination, developing an economy, plus daylighting a river, in Fall River is just about God and politics.
Like everything else.


Large said...

Doesn't Topper control the waterways ???

methinks we have found the missing plague the one right after......

rivers flow red-(ish brown)

statesmen become politicians

I'm going to load more ammo cause this is looking worse than anything we could have dreamed up on a dog watch ..

ThirdMate said...

That's 'waterworks,' not 'waterways.'
And I wouldn't sign off on that unless there's a sail on it. And besides Sam Clemens, who wants to be a river navigator anyway?