Friday, March 6, 2009

Soles'n'Bowls

  • The media outlets around here have no real competition. I mean, they compete, but not among like entities. I mean, they don't have any source of intra-industry engagement. (Except if you count the malcontents and morons who type in the comments sections or call the talk shows, but they're usually just plotting treasonous activities, hoping for the President to fail, spreading recklessly incorrect rumors, and badmouthing liberals).
  • Which is why the newspaper and the radio station nearby are going after each other. The "no real competition" thing, I mean. In real cities, a few radio stations fight it out to see who's better. By being better.
  • The local stations on this stretch of The Beach don't care about being better.
  • I suppose I would have to side with the paper because its output is written down and passed around (for now) so it has to be somewhat accurate and conform to some print media industry standards, understand the market, provide dependable service, be generally editorially consistent, and exhibit a certain degree of journalistic integrity.
  • The radio station insults the community every day, not serving that community while constantly saying that it does, and will encourage you to shut it off or buy your own if you don't like it.
  • Let's say that you've come up with an odiously lame-brained publicity stunt. You are incapable of discerning that your little scheme has a huge hole in its logic.
  • This plays out as a classic half-cocked ruse that clearly demonstartes the madness at play at that radio station..
  • "Send me your shirt and we'll send it to the State House to show them you won't let them take the shirt off your back!" says the news-anchor-who-is-also-a-whiny-bitch-of-a-right-wing-talk-host. On the same station.
  • So, let me get this straight: You want to send a message to the legislators (or the governor or something -- he wasn't clear and just got louder, rather than more lucid) by sending elected officials our shirts. In order to tell them that they can't take the shirts off our backs. So some bewildered listeners send them in anyway.
  • I can't wait to see the headlines: Obama wears blue tie. Dow up. Blue ties fly off racks. No issues with 'causality' here.
  • That no one pointed out the folly of this endeavor to this poor on-air idiot is unconscionable. A simple "Hey, maybe we should think this through. You know, the logic" would suffice. Either nobody is paying attention (highly likely) or nobody cares (also an option). Either way, I wouldn't advertise there. Because I would hate to have my business associated with a dumbass baffling flummox dreamed up by specious delusional frightened miscast narcissists. Who don't talk to each other.
  • But I tend to overthink things. (I learned that when I worked in real radio.)
  • So, here's this:

6 comments:

steve said...

And when will you be posting your music video "Mayor of Tiverton" for us?

ThirdMate said...

That isn't what I posted? Damned youToob!

steve said...

"Well, I don't know how to write a big book,
And all printed matter, well I just shun
And I may be the mayor of Tiverton,
Yes, I know few things,
etc."
Sing with me, now!

ThirdMate said...

Or is that "READ a big book" ?

(I thought it was "I don't know how to publish a book, so all printed matter I just shun..." But that might be in the "special" remix.)

steve said...

Well, the lyrics refer to the six readers in total (including you) who read that book of mine, published AND pulped.

ThirdMate said...

Oh. I thought you were socking me for not getting that last chapter of mine done.

Have you thought of a graphic novel? Put a samurai and a shapely lass on the cover. Let me talk to your people. (Honestly, filmwise, there are scenes in it that I'd love to direct. Just as they're written. The raid on Yomitan. Damn! Brilliant stuff. Didn't Bryant Gumbel describe your tone as "personable"? )