Saturday, January 16, 2010

A Very Special Election Day in Massachusetts

One may harbor strong opinions about whether a PVC or stainless steel S-trap is most appropriate for one's own shanty's undersink gimmickry, but eventually a licensed professional plumbarian must be enlisted.
As someone who has been actively involved in both home plumbing and politics, I can tell you that both are assemblages of connivance that are complex and messy to the verge of immorality. The unprepared really shouldn't have anything to do with either.
Which is to say: No, you don't want them to show you how they make their sausages.
Remember that for at least thirty years, local SouthCoast state representatives have been quoted over and again as saying that voters "just don't know how to do it in Boston and should leave things to the professionals." Whether these professionals are "smarter" than their constituents is not usually in dispute: they are nice people who have chosen a way of life that involves verbal defensiveness and brief teasing glimpses at their narcissism. They were probably nice back in Fifth Grade. When everybody was nice except for that one kid who's probably dead or in jail now. (Which completes the analogy rather neatly.)
I assume a certain facile civic expertise gained through my own upbringing in southeastern New England. Massachusetts politics was the common chatter in our Colonial Blue breakfast nook in nearby Rhode Island. It seemed that I must have met or been been somehow related to every celebrity pol who was named on the Boston stations.
Years passed and one fellow that I remember clearly and with some admiration is Ed Brooke, who was a Senator from Massachusetts. Besides being African-American, he was the first Republican to demand President Nixon's resignation.
Surprise !!1! Yes, it is TRUE. He was Republican and probably still is, although he lives in Florida now. Massachusetts has long been led and legislated to by Republicans. And I live in a part of the Commonwealth where most members of the party of Lincoln never changed over to "D" when the rest of the country did.
So why is there this constant chorus nationally decrying "Liberal Massachusetts" as "the Bluest State," "the Socialist Peoples Republic of Taxachusetts," and many other even more unsavory monickers?
Massachusetts is being reimagined by small imaginations as a "battleground" state when it has never been one. Except for skirmishes waged by the consanguine paranoid litter of mouthy self-proclaimed victims of perceived political discrimination. Who supply the radio stations with callers while relieving them of actual listeners.
If the election of a successor to any dead Solon means that one party would have ONE vote more than another party -- a vague supremacy at best -- we must be hourly regaled with "news" stories. Aspirants for the vacated seat are dissected. Monies are collected nationally and spent assembling embarrassing political advertisements. Because the big girls' blouses at the Washington Post and New York Times huff that it's the most important election EVAHR!!1!
All that this election really "means" is that someone -- who is not Ted Kennedy -- will be representing Massachusetts while the nation's Legislative Branch passes something that doesn't look anything like what Ted Kennedy had envisioned or intended.
On Tuesday, Massachusetts voters get to choose which single person gets a single-payer health care plan that Massachusetts voters most likely will never have.
And that's why I leave you with a picture of former Wendy's mascot Clare Kramer reminding Massachusetts voters to ... well, you know... whatever...'Old Glory,' indeed.

(This presentation includes a photograph of Clare Elizabeth Kramer.)


Chuck said...

Long lines at the polls in my town. Not sure what's up... people must have strong feelings about raising the meal tax by .75%.

PJ said...

It's the principle. People are tired of the gubmint in their Lobster Hut.

Karie said...

So pathetic. And they don't even tip the waitstaff right anymore, eitha!